I start my first placement tomorrow and I am so ridiculously scared. I keep feeling excited one minute then almost sick the next. What if I'm crap? What if I hurt someone? What if I'm not cut out for this? What if I don't understand anything? What if, what it, what if?
I guess I could worry myself sick over it but I'm trying really hard to keep a positive head, hell I've worked really hard to get this and now I have I'm scared of it! Someone slap me!
Anyway, it's a 13 hour shift, and I'm going to to try and get an early night tonight but I probably won't sleep as I'm so scared! I just wish my first week was over and I could be a bit more relaxed!
Sorry this is going to be a short post, I'm off shopping as I still haven't found any shoes that are comfy enough for all those hours I'll spend on my feet! I've been looking for ages but I guess that's what I get for having size 8 feet!
Anyhoo, I just noticed I have some followers, thanks guys! Hope it's not too boring reading this and feel free to leave a comment!
Better go and hit the shops! I'll let everyone know what happens when my first week is over, hopefully I'll not make a complete idiot of myself, but I'm making no promises!
P.S. I finally got my essay title sorted yay!
P.P.S. I got the all clear from MRSA, which is what I needed to work for the trust I'm working for, so I'm glad about that! Not all trusts do MRSA checks (I think they should though!) but as something like 1 in 4 people carry it with no problems, it's good to be checked and been clear!
P.P.P.S. Am thinking about doing a year in Australia once (if!) I qualify, sounds good and think I need to look into it very early on!
Tuesday, 10 March 2009
Thursday, 26 February 2009
It's been a while!
I apologise for not blogging sooner! I've been busy but that's no excuse!
So what have I been up to? OK many many presentations, researching 'Evidence Based Practice' (a.k.a. bane of my life), doing lots of practicals which I really enjoy more than I thought as usually I'm too scared to get up and do stuff (!), lectures which are intertesting...lots!
This week I got my first Hep B jab as I couldn't get it til I got clearance from the occupational health people. It's ok going on a placement with just one dose so I'm not too worried about that. I've managed to ring up my mentor for my first placement and she sounds absolutely lovely so I'm really pleased about that!
We had a lecture last week about how we do 6 weeks of lectures then a week off then 6 weeks placement then a week off continuously so that students don't feel stressed or feel like leaving - at the time I thought 'I'll never feel like that' but seriously, the lecturer was right, this week I've just been having a bad one. I know for a fact I would never leave, I'm a little fighter and it's been such a dream to get a place, but, to be honest I've been feeling really worried about it all. Maybe it's only just hit me that I'm going to be a nurse with responsibilities eventually, and so many points made in lectures have made it look like they're trying to put us off...and I can see why it would some people, but I'd never leave or at least I hope not! I'm sorry if this makes no sense, I'm tired yet I can't sleep, cos I'm just worried about a lot of things.
On a more positive side I got my uniform today, but I felt a bit numb about it as, like I say I'm worrying about everything! Really kinda spoilt the experience for myself as I was looking forward to getting my uniform as I'd feel like a 'proper' nurse. Anyway I can just about get it on but I don't look good! Never mind!
I think I'll go now as I'm tired and need to be up early tomorrows seminar on injection technique! I really hope I'm feeling more positive in the moring, I'm going to force myself to smile more and hope that it makes me feel better!
So what have I been up to? OK many many presentations, researching 'Evidence Based Practice' (a.k.a. bane of my life), doing lots of practicals which I really enjoy more than I thought as usually I'm too scared to get up and do stuff (!), lectures which are intertesting...lots!
This week I got my first Hep B jab as I couldn't get it til I got clearance from the occupational health people. It's ok going on a placement with just one dose so I'm not too worried about that. I've managed to ring up my mentor for my first placement and she sounds absolutely lovely so I'm really pleased about that!
We had a lecture last week about how we do 6 weeks of lectures then a week off then 6 weeks placement then a week off continuously so that students don't feel stressed or feel like leaving - at the time I thought 'I'll never feel like that' but seriously, the lecturer was right, this week I've just been having a bad one. I know for a fact I would never leave, I'm a little fighter and it's been such a dream to get a place, but, to be honest I've been feeling really worried about it all. Maybe it's only just hit me that I'm going to be a nurse with responsibilities eventually, and so many points made in lectures have made it look like they're trying to put us off...and I can see why it would some people, but I'd never leave or at least I hope not! I'm sorry if this makes no sense, I'm tired yet I can't sleep, cos I'm just worried about a lot of things.
On a more positive side I got my uniform today, but I felt a bit numb about it as, like I say I'm worrying about everything! Really kinda spoilt the experience for myself as I was looking forward to getting my uniform as I'd feel like a 'proper' nurse. Anyway I can just about get it on but I don't look good! Never mind!
I think I'll go now as I'm tired and need to be up early tomorrows seminar on injection technique! I really hope I'm feeling more positive in the moring, I'm going to force myself to smile more and hope that it makes me feel better!
Tuesday, 3 February 2009
Happy!
I'm feeling ultra happy today, I don't know whether it's because it's snowing like crazy and looks so pretty, or just whether I'm generally feeling pretty contented with life! Either way it's a nice feeling!
So what have I been up to? Loads! I've been so busy, if I'm not in lectures I'm reading as much as I can or writing up notes...it's never ending BUT I LOVE IT! I think my last blog was a bit moany, and I don't moan! I decided that instead of worrying about being so behind compared to everyone else, and instead of thinking I couldn't do this, I decided to kick myself up the backside and just put my all in to it! If then, after spending every spare minute I have studying, and I still feel behind, then I'll ask a tutor or someone in my group for a bit of help! I'm just going to think positively and hopefully it'll work!
Anyhoo, so far since I started a mere...3 weeks ago, I've learnt loads, from anatomy to child protection acts, from models of nursing to taking manual blood pressures (hard I tell you!) but I'm really enjoying it! I'm getting itchy feet a bit as I really want to go out on placement and see it all in practice! I think I'll learn so much more from doing it, or seeing it, than I ever will from just reading about it! I can't wait! I'm not even bothered about early starts and long hours, I want to enjoy every second of it! I still feel like I'm in a dream and someone will pinch me and tell me I'm not really going to be a nurse! I know I'm wishing my life away but I can't wait to become a fully qualified nurse and get my dream job working with neonates. Still, I'm sure the 2 years will fly by and I'll be missing my student days!
That's me done, I'm half way through writing up some child protection stuff, and whilst I know it's important to know this, it's really upsetting to read some of it, so I thought I'd let myself have a little break and make a blog!
Catch you later!
So what have I been up to? Loads! I've been so busy, if I'm not in lectures I'm reading as much as I can or writing up notes...it's never ending BUT I LOVE IT! I think my last blog was a bit moany, and I don't moan! I decided that instead of worrying about being so behind compared to everyone else, and instead of thinking I couldn't do this, I decided to kick myself up the backside and just put my all in to it! If then, after spending every spare minute I have studying, and I still feel behind, then I'll ask a tutor or someone in my group for a bit of help! I'm just going to think positively and hopefully it'll work!
Anyhoo, so far since I started a mere...3 weeks ago, I've learnt loads, from anatomy to child protection acts, from models of nursing to taking manual blood pressures (hard I tell you!) but I'm really enjoying it! I'm getting itchy feet a bit as I really want to go out on placement and see it all in practice! I think I'll learn so much more from doing it, or seeing it, than I ever will from just reading about it! I can't wait! I'm not even bothered about early starts and long hours, I want to enjoy every second of it! I still feel like I'm in a dream and someone will pinch me and tell me I'm not really going to be a nurse! I know I'm wishing my life away but I can't wait to become a fully qualified nurse and get my dream job working with neonates. Still, I'm sure the 2 years will fly by and I'll be missing my student days!
That's me done, I'm half way through writing up some child protection stuff, and whilst I know it's important to know this, it's really upsetting to read some of it, so I thought I'd let myself have a little break and make a blog!
Catch you later!
Thursday, 22 January 2009
Keep on smiling...
I thought it was about time I made another blog entry! This might be a mammoth entry but oh well!
Right so, first things first, I should hopefully finally have clearance form occupational health, I won’t believe it til I see it in print mind! I had my second mantoux test on Monday and went back today, no reaction, so I was expecting to have to make an appointment to get a BCG, then of course the Hep B at the same time, but was surprised to find out I was having the BCG there and then! Actually it was probably best they did it that way, then I couldn’t worry about it! I was dreading it as people have said it really knacks, but to be honest, it didn’t hurt too bad, though I may be saying something else tomorrow morning!
Also this week I got my CRB back too, so that’s one thing less to worry about. I also sent off my bursary form as I finally got an appointment to open a student account, so it seems like its all go!
As for Uni itself, I really do love it, though I managed to get myself into a tizz and was nearly crying (mainly with frustration but more about that later!) on the way home today! We’ve been given assessment details, exam details (a FOUR HOUR exam!) and other things we need to read/learn/know…it’s only the first proper academic week and already I am feeling as stressed as I did during my finals (seriously!) it’s so fast paced, and whilst I knew it was going to be intense doing an accelerated course, I didn’t think it would be so hard! Which is where the frustration comes in. I’m getting myself all worked up because the things we’re learning, it seems like EVERYONE knows about but me! Honestly, I’m clearly the class dunce. I was up late last night trying to do this work booklet thing which we only got told about yesterday to have done by today (which coincidently nobody even asked about grrrr!) and its stuff I know I know, but I just can’t remember! It seems to long ago since I studied biology, but everyone else knows their stuff. Anyhoo I got up early this morning, I’m tired, I’m getting a crappy cold and am generally feeling sorry for myself (already!) The only thing that makes me happy is that I got my placement details and it sound fantastic, I literally can’t wait to go on that! It’s on a general surgical ward and I’m really excited! Maybe once I get hands on stuck in I’ll feel a bit better about the academic side of things, but til then I’ll just have to keep smiling!
Anyway I think I need a good sleep, so I’ll be off! Contrary to what I’ve just moaned about I really am so happy to be on this course and I love it so much, I just can’t wait to be a proper nurse! :o)
Right so, first things first, I should hopefully finally have clearance form occupational health, I won’t believe it til I see it in print mind! I had my second mantoux test on Monday and went back today, no reaction, so I was expecting to have to make an appointment to get a BCG, then of course the Hep B at the same time, but was surprised to find out I was having the BCG there and then! Actually it was probably best they did it that way, then I couldn’t worry about it! I was dreading it as people have said it really knacks, but to be honest, it didn’t hurt too bad, though I may be saying something else tomorrow morning!
Also this week I got my CRB back too, so that’s one thing less to worry about. I also sent off my bursary form as I finally got an appointment to open a student account, so it seems like its all go!
As for Uni itself, I really do love it, though I managed to get myself into a tizz and was nearly crying (mainly with frustration but more about that later!) on the way home today! We’ve been given assessment details, exam details (a FOUR HOUR exam!) and other things we need to read/learn/know…it’s only the first proper academic week and already I am feeling as stressed as I did during my finals (seriously!) it’s so fast paced, and whilst I knew it was going to be intense doing an accelerated course, I didn’t think it would be so hard! Which is where the frustration comes in. I’m getting myself all worked up because the things we’re learning, it seems like EVERYONE knows about but me! Honestly, I’m clearly the class dunce. I was up late last night trying to do this work booklet thing which we only got told about yesterday to have done by today (which coincidently nobody even asked about grrrr!) and its stuff I know I know, but I just can’t remember! It seems to long ago since I studied biology, but everyone else knows their stuff. Anyhoo I got up early this morning, I’m tired, I’m getting a crappy cold and am generally feeling sorry for myself (already!) The only thing that makes me happy is that I got my placement details and it sound fantastic, I literally can’t wait to go on that! It’s on a general surgical ward and I’m really excited! Maybe once I get hands on stuck in I’ll feel a bit better about the academic side of things, but til then I’ll just have to keep smiling!
Anyway I think I need a good sleep, so I’ll be off! Contrary to what I’ve just moaned about I really am so happy to be on this course and I love it so much, I just can’t wait to be a proper nurse! :o)
Wednesday, 14 January 2009
It is without a doubt...
That THIS is what I want to do.
I love the course! I'm just so relieved/happy/glad that I've found what I want to do! The only thing I'm worried about is that I'm not clever enough to do it, or I'd make a crap nurse, but I'm going to try my best, that I do know!
OK so I'll do a quick sum up of things :o)
Day 1:
Manage to get on the metro in time to change trains then get there on time. I have no sense of direction so the fact that I did the 10 minute walk in the right direction impressed me, as I managed to find the right campus and the right building all on time!
Once I was there, I was given a name badge, info pack and a file with all my records in. I met the nine people in my group and they're all lovely! There is about 18 mental health students, 20 ish adult students and just us 9 doing childrens nursing. I like that, because we can really get to know eachother, so it's good! At Uni for my undergrad there were 150+ on my course so it was almost impossible to know everybody's names let alone get to know them! This class seems a lot more personal and it's nice and friendly.
Then we had a few people talk to us, all of them thoroughly lovely and made me feel really welcome! It's just a really friendly campus and Uni, and I can tell it's a great place to learn. There is all sorts of support if needed and it just feels so right.
Anyway, then we met out guidance tutors, mine is fab! My tutor group is just the nine of us doing childrens nursing. We had one of those ice breaker things when everyone says a bit about themselves. Then it was a campus tour, then home time! First day over!
Day 2:
I was kind of dreading this one - UNIFORM FITTING! Scary stuff when you're the size of a hippo. Anyway, I didn't sleep much the night before as I was so worried! That made me almost fall asleep all day but, it actually wasn't as bad as I thought! I was assuming (or had been told) we all stripped off and tried stuff on, but it was nowt like that! We just told the lady our sizes and she gave us uniforms to try on in the toilets! They're small fitting, and, as I'm tall, the trousers are really short and look crap, but I might get away with wearing my own!
After that we had an admin session which basically ensured all our paperwork was correct, then a lecture with other people such as those from the library, occ health, student services etc, just giving us general info; that was the end of day 2!
Day 3:
This was the start of 'real' work, we had a 2 and a half hour lecture/workshop introducing us to our individual courses. We looked at a case study which was really interesting and we have work to do on that. I felt a bit rubbish though as I felt to shy to say anything about it. I feel like everyone else on the course is either way more experienced/clever/know what they're doing, and I'm worried I'll say something really thick. I need to get over this but it's kinda like a fear that I'm going to make an idiot out of myself (easily done!) I don't know, maybe in a few weeks I'll feel more comfortable, we'll see.
Anyway, after an IT lesson, we had a welcome party which was really good! There was a free drink (but I was driving boo hoo!) and a live band and a buffet! Was really good! I'm not in again til Tuesday so I have a really nice long weekend! Mind you I have loads of Occ Health appointments to try and get health clearance! Honestly, I know it needs to be done but it's such a hassle!
Righto that is all for now, I'm really feeling tired! Lack of sleep I think!
Take Care xxx
I love the course! I'm just so relieved/happy/glad that I've found what I want to do! The only thing I'm worried about is that I'm not clever enough to do it, or I'd make a crap nurse, but I'm going to try my best, that I do know!
OK so I'll do a quick sum up of things :o)
Day 1:
Manage to get on the metro in time to change trains then get there on time. I have no sense of direction so the fact that I did the 10 minute walk in the right direction impressed me, as I managed to find the right campus and the right building all on time!
Once I was there, I was given a name badge, info pack and a file with all my records in. I met the nine people in my group and they're all lovely! There is about 18 mental health students, 20 ish adult students and just us 9 doing childrens nursing. I like that, because we can really get to know eachother, so it's good! At Uni for my undergrad there were 150+ on my course so it was almost impossible to know everybody's names let alone get to know them! This class seems a lot more personal and it's nice and friendly.
Then we had a few people talk to us, all of them thoroughly lovely and made me feel really welcome! It's just a really friendly campus and Uni, and I can tell it's a great place to learn. There is all sorts of support if needed and it just feels so right.
Anyway, then we met out guidance tutors, mine is fab! My tutor group is just the nine of us doing childrens nursing. We had one of those ice breaker things when everyone says a bit about themselves. Then it was a campus tour, then home time! First day over!
Day 2:
I was kind of dreading this one - UNIFORM FITTING! Scary stuff when you're the size of a hippo. Anyway, I didn't sleep much the night before as I was so worried! That made me almost fall asleep all day but, it actually wasn't as bad as I thought! I was assuming (or had been told) we all stripped off and tried stuff on, but it was nowt like that! We just told the lady our sizes and she gave us uniforms to try on in the toilets! They're small fitting, and, as I'm tall, the trousers are really short and look crap, but I might get away with wearing my own!
After that we had an admin session which basically ensured all our paperwork was correct, then a lecture with other people such as those from the library, occ health, student services etc, just giving us general info; that was the end of day 2!
Day 3:
This was the start of 'real' work, we had a 2 and a half hour lecture/workshop introducing us to our individual courses. We looked at a case study which was really interesting and we have work to do on that. I felt a bit rubbish though as I felt to shy to say anything about it. I feel like everyone else on the course is either way more experienced/clever/know what they're doing, and I'm worried I'll say something really thick. I need to get over this but it's kinda like a fear that I'm going to make an idiot out of myself (easily done!) I don't know, maybe in a few weeks I'll feel more comfortable, we'll see.
Anyway, after an IT lesson, we had a welcome party which was really good! There was a free drink (but I was driving boo hoo!) and a live band and a buffet! Was really good! I'm not in again til Tuesday so I have a really nice long weekend! Mind you I have loads of Occ Health appointments to try and get health clearance! Honestly, I know it needs to be done but it's such a hassle!
Righto that is all for now, I'm really feeling tired! Lack of sleep I think!
Take Care xxx
Thursday, 8 January 2009
Not that much further forward but getting there!
So, after weeeeeeeks of waiting I finally got my Student Number through this morning! I can send off my bursary forms now, and hopefully get some sort of bursary soon, but til then I'm going to have to live off a giant over draft.
Not so further forward news - my Mantoux test wasn't positive, so I will probably need a BCG. I don't care for the injections, needles don't bother me BUT I just want to get stuck in! I start on Monday and I really wanted to start with a clean slate, with all vaccinations/bursary/everything else sorted! Sadly it's not to be. Never mind.
OMG 3 days to go!
Not so further forward news - my Mantoux test wasn't positive, so I will probably need a BCG. I don't care for the injections, needles don't bother me BUT I just want to get stuck in! I start on Monday and I really wanted to start with a clean slate, with all vaccinations/bursary/everything else sorted! Sadly it's not to be. Never mind.
OMG 3 days to go!
Monday, 5 January 2009
Happy 2009!
This year is gonna be great!
Righto so a bit of an update. I rang up Uni this morning after trying all ways to get logged on, guy on the phone said put all the password in lower case (even though it said in the letter do put it in uppercase) and that worked, so, one less thing to worry about!
I had my Mantoux test today and I have to go back on Thursday for the results. If I have no reaction then I'll have another test and if still no reaction I'll get given a BCG. All this will be happening whilst I'm getting my Hep B jabs, so I asked if there would be an issue with them being done the same time and was told 'Don't worry pet, we'll just put one in each arm' Oh that made me laugh! I can almost picture me walking out the place with big gorilla arms, but that's probably just my warped imagination! Anyway, feeling a bit less worried about that.
Stillllll nothing from the bursary people so I'm going to have to phone up tomorrow and see if they have a number for me yet! Also I have no idea what time I start, where I'm supposed to be and what I need to bring and I start a week today! I'm still really excited!
I'd better be off now, I'm full of cold BUT glad it's here now as opposed to next week!
P.S. I forgot to say, I got a Minnie Mouse Nurse fob watch for Christmas! It was so cute I nearly cried cos I was thinking 'I'm really going to be a nurse!' It means so much to be doing this, which is probably quite sad, but I don't care! I'm going to be the best nurse I can be.
Righto so a bit of an update. I rang up Uni this morning after trying all ways to get logged on, guy on the phone said put all the password in lower case (even though it said in the letter do put it in uppercase) and that worked, so, one less thing to worry about!
I had my Mantoux test today and I have to go back on Thursday for the results. If I have no reaction then I'll have another test and if still no reaction I'll get given a BCG. All this will be happening whilst I'm getting my Hep B jabs, so I asked if there would be an issue with them being done the same time and was told 'Don't worry pet, we'll just put one in each arm' Oh that made me laugh! I can almost picture me walking out the place with big gorilla arms, but that's probably just my warped imagination! Anyway, feeling a bit less worried about that.
Stillllll nothing from the bursary people so I'm going to have to phone up tomorrow and see if they have a number for me yet! Also I have no idea what time I start, where I'm supposed to be and what I need to bring and I start a week today! I'm still really excited!
I'd better be off now, I'm full of cold BUT glad it's here now as opposed to next week!
P.S. I forgot to say, I got a Minnie Mouse Nurse fob watch for Christmas! It was so cute I nearly cried cos I was thinking 'I'm really going to be a nurse!' It means so much to be doing this, which is probably quite sad, but I don't care! I'm going to be the best nurse I can be.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
